While watching the documentaries and reading books on successful people, I noticed two things common among successful people: they persevered in the face of defeat, and they looked at tragedies in their life as an opportunity.
Here I am sharing some of my favorite quotes and my interpretation of those quotes. You may interpret them differently.
Apply these quotes to your life accordingly and move in the direction of success and dream.
Warren Buffett Quotes With Deep Meaning
– Warren Buffett loved to read books as a child. Very early on, he had a mindset of “being his boss.” Although he did not get into Harvard Business school (which, according to Buffett, was the best thing that happened to him), he met a teacher Ben Graham from whom he learned two rules of investing. 1. Never Lose Money. 2. Never Forget Rule Number One. He invested in cheap stocks for a long time. Warren Buffett had a net worth of $1 million by the age of 30.
“Chains of habit are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken.”
We must take the inventory of our habits every so often because habits form ever so slowly.
If we have bad habits that negatively affect our lives, we must catch them sooner and change them.
If we do not make an effort to change our bad habits now, they become too difficult to break and may lead us in a direction we do not intend to go.
“You only have one body and one mind, and it has to last you a lifetime, so take care of it.”
Earl Nightingale once said, “People value what they seeand is tangible such as expensive cars, nice clothes, expensive watches, big house.
However, they neglect the thing they cannot seeand is intangible – their mind.”
People hold these tangible things closer to their hearts and take good care of them. If somebody banged their expensive car, then they sure would get angry and upset. Yet, they neglect their priceless body and mind.
“It’s better to hang out with people better than you. Pick out associates whose behavior is better than yours, and you’ll drift in that direction.”
If you want to feel smartest, then hang out with people who are dumber than you, but that does not mean you are the smartest. Does it?
Always look for an opportunity to grow in every area of life. If you are in a room full of people and you identify you know more than them, it is time to find someone who knows more than you do and make them your new associates.
“It’s kind of crazy to spend your life painting if you are painting a subject you don’t want to look at.”
Do what you want to do in your life because you are accountable to yourself at the end of the day!
Do you want to keep doing what other people expect you to do, or do you want to go for your true calling and be honest to yourself?
If you keep living other people’s dreams, then you will eventually hate it. It is your life, your dream. So, live the life of your dream!
“It takes 20 years to build a reputation and 5 minutes to lose it.”
Trust and reputation go hand in hand. When we buy a particular product from a specific company, we trust that brand/company. That company has built a reputation to earn your trust, in turn, earn your business.
Be careful with whom you associate.
If you have built a good reputation based on your values and beliefs, you do not want to risk that long-built reputation in few minutes by adopting the opposite values.
Oprah Winfrey Quotes With Deep Meaning
– Oprah had anything but a “perfect childhood.” Her mother did not accept Oprah when she was a little girl because of her skin color. Oprah lived with her grandmother for few years because she was born to her mother out of wedlock.
When she was nine years old, she was raped by her cousin and later molested by men in her family.
Oprah may not have had a perfect childhood. However, Oprah had a dream and always knew what she wanted. As rough as her childhood has been, today, Oprah is a successful woman. She did not allow her tragedies to take over her whole life.
“Luck is preparation meeting opportunities.”
Instead of waiting for the opportunities, prepare yourself (knowledge and skill) for what you desire, and when the opportunities come along, you will be ready for them.
“Not only you have the right to whatever you want. You have the right to change your mind.”
If you desire something in life, then go for it. Stop being a people pleaser and stop thinking about what they will feel if you changed your mind on something.
“You are responsible for your life. Although there may be a tragedy in your life, there is always a possibility to triumph. It does not matter who you are or where you come from. The ability to triumph begins with you. Always!”
You can see the glass as half full or half empty. You can be an optimist or pessimist.
How we deal with tragedies in our lives is always our choice because you can either accept tragedies as a defeat and retreat or take them as a steppingstone to keep moving forward.
The difference is one action will take you backward, possibly where you do not want to be five years down the road, and the other action will take you where you always wanted to be. Learn to let go of your past mistakes.
“The thing you fear most has no power. Your fear of it is what has the power. Facing the truth will set you free.”
It takes courage to face our fears because fear is not a real thing.
It is Fall Evidence Appearing Real.
We cook up all the negative stuff inside our heads. Before we even take the first step towards anything, we think of failure.
How do we even know that we are going to fail unless we try it?
And if we are not even taking the first step, we are robbing ourselves of the beautiful life waiting ahead of us.
“You are worthy to say No!”
Learn to set boundaries with the people around you. It is okay to say no when you are not comfortable doing what you are not supposed to do. It is all about how you feel about it. Also, when you stand your ground, you will figure out who is your well-wisher and who is fake.
Wayne Dyer Quotes With Deep Meaning
– Wayne’s father walked out of him when he was a kid. Wayne lived in an orphanage until he was ten years old. Although he lived in series of foster homes, he looked at the situation positively. One of Wayne’s best qualities was his ability to turn a negative situation into a positive one.
“You cannot always control what goes on outside. But you can always control what goes on inside.”
If we wait for the external environment to get better for us to feel happy and loved, we will be forever waiting.
What happens outside of us may not be in our control. However, how we interpret the outside world is within our control.
When somebody cuts you off on the highway, do you get angry and start cussing? Which, by the way, the other driver cannot even hear. Isn’t that silly? The other driver probably just cut off in front of you and drove away. The driver does not know, nor even care if you are upset.
“You, and only YOU, are the subject that impacts the burning desire in your imagination.”
When we were a kid, we spent hours imagining and living in our imagination world. As a kid, it did not matter to us how silly we looked because, for us, our imagination was “real.” When we became adults, we let go of our vision and started living by other people’s standards.
There are few; when they have an imagination, they act and follow through. Some of the things around us existed in someone’s imagination before they became a reality. The smartphone, the TV, the chair you are sitting on, and the list can go on.
If you have an imagination, then have a burning desire until it comes to fruition because who knows your imagination may positively help others?
“If you like to accomplish something, you must first expect it of yourself.”
If we plan to inspire others, then we must first be able to motivate ourselves. Before you love someone else, expect to love yourself first.
Do you believe you deserve the things in yourself?
You must accept the fact that you are worthy of the things you desire. We must have expectations before the possession.
“I would rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I’m not.”
Be true to yourself, and you will attract people who like you for who you are. If you pretend to be liked by someone, then you will forever be pretending.
I had given this advice to a close friend who wanted to know if he is marrying the right person. I told him, “Do not try to be different to impress a girl, because if you begin your relationship on pretentious, you will pretend all your life.”
“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
This quote pretty much stems from the theory of quantum mechanics. When an observer looked at the electron, electrons changed their behavior.
We can apply this same principle in our life.
Whether we look at incidences in our life as positive or negative is solely our choice.
If, for instance, you take highway traffic as an opportunity to “have more time to listen to your favorite music” instead of “I hate dealing with the traffic,” then you will notice how your emotions shift.
Henry Ford Quotes With Deep Meaning
– Henry Ford was poor and uneducated (less than the sixth grade of schooling), but he had a vision of a horseless carriage. Although he was an uneducated man, he built a mastermind group (men with specialized knowledge) and use their knowledge to fulfill his vision. In 1903, Henry Ford established the Ford Motor Company, which we still see exist even today.
“Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.”
Every failure in our life brings us closer to our goals. Instead of allowing failure to define you as a failure, look at it as a great teacher. For example, when a young child touches the hot stove accidentally, they quickly learn not to touch the stove again.
“Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goals.”
When a NASCAR driver travels at an extremely high speed and is in turn, his eyes are focused on where he wants to go and not the sidewall he wants to avoid. If he took his eyes off his “desired” course, then he may quickly hit the wall and get in a crash.
We do the same thing in our life. It almost seems like we are looking for an opportunity to quit before we reach our goals. However, if you keep your eyes on the end goal, obstacles will become more of a learning point.
“Vision without execution is just hallucination.”
Everybody has a vision about the life they desire. There are only a few who will execute that vision. If you have an idea, but you do not take any action, the vision is just a dream.
“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right!”
There are only two answers to any decision. It is either “yes” or “no.” There is no middle. You either do something, or you do not.
If you want to start your own business, and if you believe you cannot, then, of course, you will not be able to start your own business. The opposite is equally valid.
To a certain extends, your “core beliefs” determine your actions and decisions in life.
“The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing.”
Your ability to learn from your past mistakes determines your future action. However, if you sulk over your past mistakes, then you surrender yourself in the face of defeat.
Not learning from your past mistakes is the worst thing you can do for your personal growth. And the worst is to keep repeating the same mistakes repeatedly and blaming them on other people, the economy, and society.
Conclusion
Life is full of ups and downs, but how we approach life is up to us. Every day is not going to be rainbow and sunshine, but we can make every day count. Instead of focusing on conflicts, mistakes, and tragedies, how about we question ourselves, “What did this experience teach me?” There is no such thing as wasted experience because every passing moment is teaching us a lesson.
“Success is walking from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.” — Winston Churchill
Do you want to be successful? I’m sure the answer to that is yes. No one strives to be low in life. Success is something that everyone wants, yet it keeps eluding. The key to create success for ourselves is in our hands. You can create success using your mind. As you read the mentioned books, you will notice that our mind is far more superior than we give credit. These are the ten bests must-read books for building your success. Please leave a comment and tell me your favorite book for success.
Think & Grow Rich – “The Secret of Success.”
Think and Grow Rich is written by Napoleon Hill. A man with whom Andrew Carnegie shared his formula of personal achievement to accumulate hundreds of millions of dollars. This formula also helped many other men earn their millions!
Carnegie did not compensate napoleon Hill for 20 more years of his service. However,
Carnegie agreed to make a “necessary introduction and cover travel expenses.” Napoleon Hill agreed to spend twenty years or more interviewing the most successful men and compile the research into the principles as “Philosophy of Individual Achievement.”
The most inspirational story in this book is the story of Napoleon Hill’s son. He shares with the reader how his son was born without a piece of physical equipment for hearing – ears. Yet his son went to become a successful man and was able to hear despite what the physicians had said.
If you study, understand, and apply the philosophy in this book, then you will be prepared to accumulate wealth and success.
Napoleon Hill mentions that “A peculiar thing about this secret is that those who once acquire it and use it find themselves literally swept on to success, with but little effort, and they never again submit to failure!”
These principles are so practical that they are still used by some successful entrepreneurs today. Bob Proctor, whom we will talk about later, has studied these laws for 60 years and has achieved great success.
As A Man Thinketh
Written by James Allen in 1903, As A Man Thinketh is a self-help book. This book is a short read and has seven chapters. Allen describes it as “a book that will help you to help yourself.” See it as a companion for oneself to lean on when in need. This entire book is influenced by the Book of Proverbs chapter 23, verse 7;
“As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.”
It reveals the power that thoughts have over our personalities, our circumstances, and our well-being. It touches on discovering the benefits of learning to master our minds & direct our thoughts toward the goals we want to achieve.
Psycho-Cybernetics
Psycho-Cybernetics is a motivational book by Maxwell Maltz. He was an American cosmetic surgeon and author.
Maltz’s books, especially Psycho-Cybernetics, are claimed to have inspired the modern self-help book genre. He coined the term Psycho-Cybernetics.
This book focuses on how you can use your mind to steer yourself toward positive goals and success.
According to Maxwell Maltz, our actions, behaviors, and personalities are built on our self-image. For example, a person may successfully lose weight but will snap back to their old weight.
A person snaps back to previous weight not because the person lacks knowledge of losing weight or lacks the willpower. The person rebounds to the last body weight because of the self-image they hold inside her mind.
Simply said, we constantly try to match the external circumstances to the self-image we carry in our subconscious mind.
If we want to change the external circumstances, then we must change our self-image first. It does not matter how old we are; our self-image can be changed.
Psycho-Cybernetics is an excellent book with lots of proof of how self-image affects our world.
The Art of Exceptional Living
The Art of Exceptional Living is by Jim Rohn. Jim Rohn shares his philosophy for wealth and happiness.
This book is also available in audiobooks. I like listening to his ideas because it almost feels like a friend is talking to you.
Jim Rohn spent five years with his mentor Earl Shoaff and learned the “fundamentals of living,” which forever changed his life.
According to Jim Rohn, you do not have to be an over-achiever to be successful in life. Instead of doing extraordinary things to achieve success, he suggests doing ordinary things extraordinarily well.
This book will help you move from having thought to act on that thought. It will help you build a new habit and stick to it by building on it every day.
Science of Getting Rich
The Science of Getting Rich is a practical guide to getting rich. This book was written in 1910, so the language is more sophisticated than the casual tone used in some other motivational books nowadays.
According to Wallace Wattles, “the science mentioned in this book is an exact science, and the failure is impossible.”
This book reveals how faith, life purpose, and vision can mold formless intelligence into riches.
By applying the science in this book, thinking, and acting according to the laws, anyone can get rich.
This book was an inspiration for the movie “The Secret.” To test if this law is accurate, you simply need to apply it yourself.
This book is a short read like “As a Man Thinketh.” However, read this book multiple times to fully grasp the “Science of Getting Rich.”
Atomic Habits
Atomic Habits by James Clear is the best book to read to learn how to form a habit. When you hear the word habit, you think only bad habits like biting your nails or not washing the dishes after using them. But you can form good ones. In this book, James Clear will teach you how to create beneficial habits to help you succeed. This book boils down setting and maintaining good habits to four simple laws
Make It Obvious
Make It Attractive
Make It Easy
Make It Satisfying
However, be prepared because some exercises (not strenuous physical exercises) James asks us to do may make you feel uncomfortable. I sure was uncomfortable, especially when he shares a “Habits Scorecard” strategy about making your current habits obvious. This exercise brings some of our aimless daily habits to our awareness.
Becoming Supernatural
Becoming Supernatural is written by Dr. Joe Dispenza. He initially appeared in a documentary called “What the Bleep do we know?”
He was scrutinized by many after his appearance in this documentary film. However, when he noticed that his information was helping some people heal emotionally, mentally, and physically, he went on to keep sharing his expertise with people regardless of whether “skeptics and rigid scientists” liked him or not.
In the book, Joe Dispenza shows how someone can alter neurotransmitters, hormones, genes, proteins, and enzymes through thought alone.
He teaches through examples how continually dwelling in “negative” past causes diseases in our body and how we can heal ourselves.
Habits of highly effective people
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey is a self-improvement book. Covey believes that our perception changes our world. The way we perceive something changes our perception, which in turn changes a given situation.
If you want to succeed in life, then you must identify the habits that will help you in your journey to success. Read this book if you’re going to learn a new skill. For success to thrive, you need to learn how to put it into action. By learning to be an effective person, you are already setting yourself up for immense success. You just won’t know it until you try it.
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a #@%!
The book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a #@%! by Mark Manson is a counterintuitive approach to living a good life. Manson makes the argument-backed by both academic research and well-timed poop jokes- that “improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade but on learning to better stomach lemons.”
We as humans have flaws and are limited- as he writes, “Not everybody can be extraordinary- there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault.”
With chapters called Don’t Try, Happiness Is a Problem, The Value of Suffering, Failure is the way Forward, and The Importance of Saying No. This book will have you not giving a care in the world, but for only yourself.
You will be striving to build success in your life. While not giving in to other’s opinions because they are just that – opinions.
You Were Born Rich
Bob Proctor’s international best-seller, You Were Born Rich, guides you through all the major principles you must understand to unlock the vast wealth of potential buried inside you. In this book, you learn:
What money is, and how can you attract more of it?
How to build prosperous images in your mind that translate into magnificent results in your life.
The Law of Attraction- why some people keep attracting negative results and others always seem to attract positive results.
The role of faith in the success
The keys to bringing abundance into your life.
The Vacuum Law of Prosperity- why you must release the old to make room for the new
This book will help you change your point of view about yourself and your abilities. It will help give you the confidence to take your life by the horns and steer it to where you want it to go.
This book is available for free download at his website.
Conclusion
Success is like a building. You have to work on your foundation first. Without a solid foundation, your building blocks won’t have a firm ground to stand on. You are the foundation to your success. The person that you see in the mirror is the firm ground you need to solidify. For your success to mean something, you need to have yourself as a person ready.
You have to be ready for the ups, the downs, the no’s, the roadblocks, and all the greatness that will come with it. Success is something that you have to work for to keep. It won’t just stay with you if you just sit and stare at it. You have to get up and do something with it.
“Productivity is never an accident. It is always the result of a commitment to excellence, intelligent planning, and focused effort.” ––Paul J. Meyer
Do you believe bad habits are sabotaging your productivity? Do you think you have control over changing your bad habits to become more productive in life?
Any habits, whether they are good are bad, are formed slowly over the years. It is up to us to recognize when we are falling into the trap of the vicious cycle of bad habits and allowing them to hurt our productivity.
Go through the list below and see which bad habit is hindering your productivity. If you have some other habits you think can be added to the list, post them in the comment below.
Bad Habit #1 – Lack of Sleep
There is a direct correlation between sleep and productivity. We may think if we decrease our sleep hours, then we will increase our productive time.
However, the opposite is the truth.
According to the American Academy of Sleep Medicine, “those with even mild insomnia experienced 58 percent more productivity loss, those who reported problems with daytime sleepiness experienced 50 percent more productivity loss.”
Bad Habit #2 – Lack of Healthy Diet
We all know and have heard many times the importance of a healthy diet. Empty calories food such as sugary drinks will give you short bursts of energy, but then it will quickly bring you down.
Also, there are adverse effects on our health as a result of poor diet.
I have noticed that when I do not take time to eat healthily, I feel lazy and sleepy during the day and lose productivity.
Bad Habit #3 – Distractions
It is easy to get distracted, primarily if you work in an environment where the television is in sight or your smartphone is at your fingertip.
When you focus on a specific task, make sure and keep your phone or the TV remote control away.
If it helps you any, then turn off the phone entirely because you want to eliminate the urge of checking the Facebook post, reading a new tweet, and replying to “unimportant emails.”
Bad Habit #4 – Procrastination
This website is around this habit – procrastination. We keep putting important tasks away either because of our deep-rooted fear or pure laziness.
If you are putting away doing essential tasks because of your fear, I suggest you first work on this problem.
If you are procrastinating because of some other reasons, then make sure you are not trying to tackle the difficult task before the simple task.
When we try to tackle the difficult task first, it is easy to get discouraged if the finish line is not in near sight.
However, if you tackle a simple task first, it gives you a sense of accomplishment and motivates you to finish the next task on your list.
Bad Habit #5 – Multiple Goals
We, especially women, are good at multi-tasking, but it does not mean we can manage multiple goals.
We do not have an infinite number of hours available in a day. If we sleep for 8 hours and work for 8 hours, it leaves us with 8 hours to focus on our goal.
Common sense says that it would be more beneficial to allocate those hours on one goal than multiple goals.
Bad Habit #6 – No Deadlines
We had known the importance of deadlines when we were a student in school and university.
There was a “due date” for the assignments for a reason. If we did not meet those deadlines, then our grades were negatively affected.
If there were no deadlines, then how would we know if we are making any progress?
Set a specific deadline for your goal and adjust your actions accordingly to complete the tasks on time.
Bad Habit #7 -Unorganized
An unorganized space is like a disorganized mind.
When your mind is scattered and cluttered, you are not able to focus. Then how is it possible for you to be productive if your plan of action, workplace, and surrounding is scattered?
Create a system to get organized. Find out what works for you to remain organized. It may be as simple as listing your “to-do tasks” on a sticky note and place them in front of you.
If possible, please avoid using the phone to remain organized. Unless you are one of the few who is disciplined and does not get easily distracted, then, by all means, use your phone.
But if you quickly get distracted, then instead of checking your “to-do” lists, you may end up checking emails, replying to texts, or checking the latest news.
Bad Habit #8 – Increased Screen Time
With all the information available at our fingertips, it is easy to lose track of time.
I specifically struggled with this one. Although I watched inspirational videos on YouTube, I spent hours and hours watching those videos because the “suggested video” title was so enticing.
Before I knew it, I had spent close to 4 hours watching inspirational videos.
Now some may be addicted to screen for different reasons. The screen time does not necessarily have to be just a smartphone. It can be TV as well.
Allocate a specific time of the day you use your phone or watch TV and stick to it.
Bad Habit #9 – Being a Perfectionist
I am the culprit of this habit myself. For example, I started working on this website in 2020, but my website did not go live until 2021. It was not that I procrastinated. I was working behind the scenes the whole time but had this attitude of having the website perfect before it went live.
If you are like I am, you need to learn to be flexible (I know it is easier said than done).
Just know that we will never be “perfect.”
We are always learning and growing.
Keep in mind that there are some things that you will learn along the way.
Bad Habit #10 – Waiting for a Perfect Time to Start
There is no such thing as “perfect time to start.” If there is a perfect time to start, then that is now.
There will always be other commitment in our life that needs our attention, but if you do not carve out the time for yourself and start now, you will never begin.
Also, once you start doing something, you get in the momentum and move towards achieving your goal.
Bad Habit #11 – Trying to Be a Superman/Superwoman
You must learn how to delegate the tasks you don’t know how to do because if you try to complete every task, you will get burned out.
Yeah, you may know how to do everything, but you just do not enough hours in a day to accomplish everything (as we discussed earlier).
If you delegate, it takes some load off of you, allowing you to be more efficient.
Bad Habit #12 – Putting Other People’s Need Before Yours
Yes, it is good to think about other people’s needs but to a certain extent. Avoid being a people pleaser and putting their needs before yours.
There is nothing wrong with being selfish.
Start treating time as a currency and decide how you will spend your time because you cannot regain lost time.
Your well-wisher will understand and support you in your endeavor.
Bad Habit #13 – Quitting Before Reaching Your Goal
Your productivity would increase so much more if you just become stubborn in achieving your goal.
If, however, you keep quitting before reaching your goal, then you have multiple incomplete goals sitting on your table.
If you fall off the wagon, instead of regressing, get back on track and keep moving forward.
Bad Habit #14 – Absorbing Useless Advice and Ideas
Stop listening to people giving you useless advice and ideas, especially if that advice and opinions come from people who have not achieved what you want.
Would you listen to a financially broke person if you desire to become financially secure?
So, before you absorb someone else’s advice, see where they are currently.
Are they following their advice?
Bad Habit #15 – Lack of Purpose
Having a lack of purpose is like driving down the road without knowing your destination. You will keep driving and never arriving.
Know the purpose of your specific goal because knowing the purpose will give you the motivation.
Bad Habit #16 – Hitting the Snooze
Once you decide to focus on a specific goal for a particular time, commit to it.
It takes a while to form new habits.
If you have decided to wake up early in the morning, instead of waking up 30 minutes to an hour early, just set your alarm clock to wake up 10 minutes before your usual wake-up time.
However, make sure that once the alarm goes off, do not hit the snooze button and fall back to sleep.
Bad Habit #17 – Stress
When there is stress, whether physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual, there is no way your brain is focusing on any goal. Under pressure, your body is in a “fight or flight response.”
To be productive, you need to figure out the root cause of your stress and manage it.
When you feel stressed, close your eyes and take few deep breaths.
If calm music helps you feel relaxed, play soft music in the background while working on a task.
Everyone is different, so figure out what works for you to relieve the stress.
Conclusion
It is not difficult to break bad habits and create new good habits. If you want to be consistently productive, you will take the inventory of your habits and make a conscious effort to change them.
These bad habits may not be the obvious ones, but you will realize that these habits were formed over the years and crept up slowly. And now, these bad habits are hurting your productivity and, in turn, hurting your success in life!
“Depending on what they are, our habits will either make us or break us. We become what we repeatedly do.” – Sean Covey
Human beings are creatures of habits, and habits are nothing more than the repetition of ideas/beliefs that we continuously keep feeding our subconscious minds.
Our subconscious mind does not know if the idea we are presenting is beneficial or harmful to us.
If the latter statement is true, it becomes crucial that we understand what we are feeding our subconscious mind.
So here are the 10 habits you can adopt to set yourself apart from the rest and be the top 1% of the population.
Habit #1. Become Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired
– Awareness is the key. You have to be aware that you are not happy where you are currently in your life for the change to happen.
If you get that “sick feeling’ in your gut when you think of your present, then it is time for you to ditch your old self and go after a new one.
If you are not tired enough of your present circumstances, the initial motivation will be short-lived.
To put it in the simplest term, your current “pain” should be far more than the pain you will face along the way to achieving your goal.
Habit #2. Stop Living in the Past. Let Go of Your Old Stories
– You have already paid the price once for past mistakes. You do not have to keep paying the price.
You have a choice to either keep reliving the past mistakes or let go of your old stories.
Neither one of them requires more effort than the other. When you keep living in the past, then that becomes your reality, your identity.
Plus, when you keep living in the past, you remain stuck. Whereas when you embrace your past mistakes, not only it makes you wiser, but it also allows you to grow.
Look at your past mistakes optimistically. Look at it as a cameo in your life’s story. Your past mistakes probably taught you a lesson that you probably will avoid in the future.
Habit #3. Decide What You Want
– Decide what you want to achieve and be specific about your goal. Do not just say I want “more money.”
If you walk down the street and find a dollar bill, you have a dollar more than before. Is that your definition of “more money”?
Do not say I want to “lose weight!”
If you lose a pound in a whole year, then you have lost weight compared to before. Is that your definition of “lose weight”?
Being specific is very important because it gives you the “known target.”
Just like when you are travel from point A to point B, you plan out your route, your pit stops, and your accommodation, plan your steps to reach your “definite aim in life.”
Habit #4. Make a Decision Quickly but Change it Slowly
– Napoleon Hill said, “Successful people of the past and the present make a decision quickly but rarely change it if any.”
We, humans, are always looking for instant gratification, especially nowadays with social media.
If we decide to lose weight, we follow a diet and exercise plan for few weeks. If the result does not show in few weeks, then we move on to the next goal.
So instead of jumping from one goal to another, do yourself a favor; once you decide to change one of your habits, stick to that decision for long enough.
Habit #5. Stop Defining Yourself by Other People’s Standards
– Other people have not experienced what you have. They have not lived your life, and neither do they own your life. Other people do not know your potential. So, stop letting other people define your standards.
Sometimes when we feel like stretching and getting out of our comfort zone, our loved ones will quickly warn us of our potential failure.
The concern may be coming from a good heart, but that concern hurts your personal growth.
If you feel like your friends and loved ones will criticize your dream, let your result speak your potential. Do not share your dreams and goals with your close friends and loved ones if you think they may not understand you.
Habit #6. Stop Looking for Other People’s Validation
– Something that is right for you may not be right for someone else. Your success does not require other people’s validation. If you have a purpose in your life and know your calling, then go for it.
For example, I always desired to write a blog and help others, but I always looked for validation from my loved ones. I was afraid to be ridiculed and perhaps made fun of if I failed in getting this message to others.
Once I made up my mind and stopped looking for validation, I went for my calling. It does not matter if anyone will read these messages. This message will eventually reach out to the people who need to follow their life purpose.
Habit #7. Become Comfortable Being Uncomfortable
– Most of us do not like to get out of our comfort zone because there is always this fear of the unknown and fear of failure. But this same comfort level is stunting your growth in every area of your life.
People are not afraid of the darkness; instead, they are afraid of the light. If people knew their potential, then they would stop being comfortable in their current state.
If you have read about me, you will notice how much I have achieved in my life, and it was not because I am any more intelligent than anybody else. I have an attitude of “I want to see what my potential is.”
Once you start hitting the majority of your goals, the process becomes addictive. Almost as if you want to see what is your “ceiling.”
You may meet with temporary defeat along the way, but that does not mean you are a failure. Just thank the Universe for the experience, learn from your mistakes, modify your plan, and keep moving on.
You have already spent time and energy; you might as well keep on moving and avoid slipping back into your comfort zone. Earl Nightingale told us the secret of success in life, and he defined that success in just one word –attitude! What is your attitude towards life? Is it that of pessimist or optimist?
Habit #8. Take the First Step, Follow, and Trust the Unknown
– Martin Luther King Jr. said, “Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step.”
There will never be a “perfect time” to start taking action. To put things in momentum, you have to take the first step and keep on moving.
Like when we drive at night, we cannot see our destination, but we see few miles ahead of us. We follow the path knowing that the way will eventually lead us to our set destination.
If you have a set goal in your mind, then go ahead and take the first step. When you meet with a temporary resistance because of a lack of knowledge or resources, then resolve that along the way
You cannot be sitting there and think to yourself, “I need to know everything before I venture out to achieve my goal.” In reality, you will never know everything about a particular subject.
For instance, when I started this blog, I learned a lot along the way (building a website, hosting a website, writing blog posts,…). I had zero knowledge about this subject before this.
Habit #9. Hang Around with Like-Minded People
– If you want to know what your future will look like, then take the inventory of people around you. The people around you are pretty much the reflection of your own belief.
If you want to be successful in business, you need to find someone who has already done what you want and follow the footprints.
Hanging around with like-minded people not only makes you succeed but also keeps you focused and motivated because you all share a similar goal.
If you are a health-conscious person, you would not be hanging around those who do not believe in being health conscious. It just does not make any sense. Now, does it?
Habit #10. Persevere Until You Reach Goal
– It would be much easier to achieve every goal you set if you quit the habit of changing the goal. Make it a habit to follow through until you reach success.
It is easy to give up at the first sign of failure. However, if you persist long enough, then you will eventually achieve your goal.
Perseverance means continuing to take a small step towards your goal after the initial rush of adrenaline wears off.
The fine example we see people not persevering long enough is at the beginning of the New Year. Supposedly we need a reset point in our life to either start anew or become better than last year.
Most of us will start taking actions towards our “new year resolution,” but the minute the adrenaline wears off and life starts getting in the way, we slack off and go back to our old habits!
Yes, there will be days when you do not feel like working towards your set goals, but this is where you set yourself apart from the rest.
Even though it is a minor action, just make sure you take that small step towards your goal because it will keep the momentum going.
On the contrary, if you quit halfway, then not only do you risk setting yourself for old habits, but it also affects your self-esteem to a certain extent.
You start defining yourself as a failure, inconsistent, or just not good enough (which is not true).
Conclusion
Life is full of surprises! When we came into this world, we did not come with an operating manual. We are who we are because of the things we experienced in our life.
We are the product of our environment. Along the way, we accepted other people’s opinions about us and made it our identity.
However, we are unaware that we don’t have to keep living the life we do not want. We have the power to change our old set beliefs and habits.
“Breathe. Let go. And remind yourself that this very moment is the only one you know you have for sure” – Oprah
No matter how much we try, but we cannot change our past. The only thing we can control is our present and our future.
We do pretty well for most of our lives. Still, somewhere along the way, we also carry the baggage of self-limiting beliefs, past mistakes, anger and resentment, and sometimes toxic people and relationships.
We apply false self-limiting beliefs labels on ourselves, limiting our growth and full potential. We relive past mistakes in our heads over and over again to the point it causes frustration.
If that was not enough, we hold on to anger and resentment (whether with the people, situation, or ourselves), leading us down to more serious problems related to health, such as high blood pressure and diabetes.
And toxic people and relationships in our lives make us someone we are not, to the point we lose our own identity.
Letting go may not be an easy task, but I will take a chance to help you look at things from a different perspective and potentially help you let go.
Let Go of Self-Limiting Beliefs
1. Change inner conversations – Make a note of your inner conversations. Are they predominantly positive conversations or negative conversations?
For example, if you spill something by mistake, do you instantly tell yourself, “I am always clumsy!”?
If you make an obvious mistake on the exam, do you instantly tell yourself, “I am so stupid!! What is wrong with me?”
Hmm, now, in my view, such conversations are not helping you; instead, they are hurting you.
When you notice yourself having a negative inner conversation, switch it over instantly with a positive conversation. But you have to let go of negative conversations as much as you can.
2. Change self-limiting thoughts – “Whether you think you can or you can’t. You’re right.” – Henry Ford
Everything in the Universe comprises opposites. If there is up, then there is down. If it is right, then there is wrong. If there is happiness, and there is sadness. If there is poverty, then there is wealth.
Make a note of self-limiting thoughts and replace them because self-limiting thoughts will take you only in one direction (down), whereas unrestricted positive thoughts will take you in the opposite direction (up).
3. Create new beliefs – there is a difference between thoughts and beliefs. Thoughts are the result of beliefs.
Beliefs are repetitive conditioning of the same thoughts. Now, what do I mean by that?
Remember point #1? If I keep saying to myself, “I am so stupid!” “Why do I always make stupid mistakes?” “No wonder people think I am stupid!” What do you think this repetition of thoughts will do?
It will create my reality. Hence, my belief! All of this happens at a subconscious level. That is why some things may have happened to us in our childhood (when our mind was vulnerable to accepting anything), but we grew up making those things our reality (which sometimes are grossly false).
Let go of false beliefs and create new ones.
4. Affirm new beliefs – if repeatedly affirming false beliefs got you where you did not want to be, then do the opposites.
Take a small card and write down your new belief. It can be anything. Some of the examples can be like, “I am worthy of love!” “I am confident!” “I am smart!”
Read this affirmation as many times as you can throughout the day to replace your old negative belief with a new one.
Remember, you did not create a negative belief for yourself in just one day. It was a repetition over a while. So, it is evident that creating new beliefs will take time, repetition, and, most of all, perseverance.
5. Meditate with new beliefs – whenever you find few minutes to yourself, take a deep breath, close your eyes, quiet your mind, and imagine your “new you” as your present self.
Meditation does not have to be 30 minutes to an hour-long. It can be as short as 5 minutes. However, when you are meditating, stay focused. Avoid drifting away in the past or on all the things pending on your schedule for the day.
Become selfish and take away several few minutes to create a new you. You are worth it!
Let Go of Past Mistakes
6. Stop Obsessive thoughts – Stop replaying past mistakes inside your head over and over again. It is the worst thing you can do to yourself.
Your mind cannot tell the difference between imagination or reality. For example, suppose we keep playing negative thoughts inside our heads. In that case, our mind thinks it is happening right now and releases the chemical inside your body that negatively affects you and eventually makes you sick.
The idea mentioned above is Joe Dispenza’s. So, when you find yourself having obsessive thoughts, head over to YouTube and watch one of his videos, and you will know what I mean.
7. Take inventory of past achievements rather than past mistakes – Now, we have not ONLY made mistakes in our life. Is it?
Instead of focusing on past mistakes, how about focusing on past achievements?
Focusing on your achievements will give you self-confidence and courage to move on in the right direction.
Learn how to let go of the past and hold on to your achievements.
8. List things learned from past mistakes – With every mistake comes a lesson. I truly believe that! Now either we can look at a cup as half empty or half full. The choice is ours.
What did you learn from your past mistakes? I know one of my mistakes was deciding to write a blog back in 2014. However, “self-limiting thoughts” set in, and I put my dream aside until now. That is seven years later!!!
Do you know how much time I lost? Maybe all these years, I could have been sharing my words of wisdom and knowledge and help someone! Perhaps I could have helped someone turn his/her life around for the better.
I learned from my past mistakes that I should have faced my fear head-on and taken action anyway. What is the worst it could have happened? Of course, I would have lost some of my time, but that would have been way much better than where I am (not closer to my goal).
Now I can sit here and cuss myself on missing those seven years or dust myself off and start where I am now.
Because in the future, I want to remember my success, not my mistakes!
9. Stop the temptation of going old ways again – Even now and then, when the doubt sips in, I feel the temptation of going old ways again.
It is easy to go back to our comfort zone because we humans are always in a survival mode. If something feels like a threat to us, then we start looking for a safe place.
This is where you need to know how badly you want something. If the desire is strong, you will keep moving forward even though there are roadblocks along the way.
10. Be grateful for your past mistakes – this point is connected to point #7. Be genuinely thankful for your past mistakes because they have helped you grow and mature.
If you made mistakes of hanging around with the wrong people for a long time, then be grateful for that because now you can differentiate between “wrong people” and “right people” for you.
If eating unhealthy and not exercising has caused some kind of disease in your body, be grateful for that, because now you have learned the importance of eating healthy and how sometimes it can reverse some of the diseases.
Let go of mistakes that don’t serve you well in life.
Let Go of Anger and Resentment
11. Find the reason for anger and resentment – it is vital that before we resolve any issue, we find its cause first.
Find out if the reason for your anger and resentment is huge or small. Remember defining the reasons as big or small is subjective and is different for everyone.
Sometimes, we realize that the anger and resentment we hold are not reasonable. And sometimes, some anger and bitterness are not even worth our time and energy.
12. Resolve if possible – holding anger will not do anyone any good. Mainly, it is not going to do you any good.
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” – Buddha
If there is room to talk with the person you hold anger with, approach that person and talk it out.
It does not mean you have to accept that person back in your life and repeat the whole cycle, but it helps both you and the other person move forward with a clean heart.
If all fails, then let go!
13. Cry It Out – I remember when I lost my daughter back in 2008, I was so consumed with anger. I was angry with myself, with the people around me, with the Universe itself!
But do you know what helped? Instead of suppressing my anger, I cried out every time I felt the anger.
Not only it made me a stronger person, but it helped me let go of the anger and blame.
14. Take Responsibility – “It is easy to see the faults of others, but difficult to see one’s faults. One shows the faults of others like chaff winnowed in the wind, but one conceals one’s faults as a cunning gambler conceals his dice.” – Buddha
Sometimes we become so consumed with our hurt that we tend to forget that we may have been responsible for our pain somewhere along the way.
It is easy to shift blames on others, but it takes courage to take responsibility for our wrongdoing.
We may be correct from our perspective, but if we step in another person’s shoes, does the situation look the same from the other side?
15. Take a walk out in nature – if all fails, then nature is the best healer for our wound.
Take some time and take a walk on the grass barefoot.
Maybe find a place where you can close your eyes and hear the gentle flow of the river or the lake. Then, imagine “that flow” washing away your anger and resentment.
Let Go of Toxic People and Relationships
16. Make a list of people with whom you spend most of your time – “You are the average of five people you spend the most time with.” – Jim Rohn
It means that you do not need a fortune teller or a globe to tell you what your future will be.
If you want to be successful, then surround yourself with successful people. If you’re going to be healthy, then surround yourself with healthy people. If you’re going to be wealthy, then surround yourself be rich people.
Identify when to let go of toxic people and relationships.
17. Test your “close friends” – I once heard a beautiful lecture by Les Brown, and he said, “How do you know if real or flaky people surround you? Test them!
Call them up and tell them there is a significant event coming up for you, and it would mean a lot to you if they joined you for the event.
If they refuse to come, then kindly thank them and hang up the phone. People who showed up (despite their busy schedule) for your special moment are your well-wisher.”
18. Set boundaries – boundaries in any relationship are necessary. If there are no boundaries, then the relationship becomes imbalanced and eventually suffers the consequences.
“You teach people how to treat you by what you let them get away with.” James Clear
We form a relationship with the other person with the intention that the other person will accept you for who you are, and you will do the same for the other person.
However, as months and years pass and we become attached to the other person, we start lowering our standards just to be liked and loved.
Over time, the relationship becomes imbalanced.
19. Stop losing yourself in a Relationship – being kind and loving is okay but losing yourself in a relationship is not. It is especially true for us women who innately are caring and nurturing.
Sometimes we bend over backward so much in a relationship that we lose our own identity and forget our values.
Remember, if somebody is meant to stay in your life, then he/she will stay. Therefore, you will not have “to work” for it.
And thinking your love and kindness will change other person’s unacceptable behaviors towards you, make the other person a better human, or make them love you, then I am sorry to say that such things rarely happen.
Are you willing to lose yourself in a toxic relationship? Let go of the relationship that is making you toxic as well!
20. Do not be afraid of losing people and starting over – it is easy to stay in a comfort zone and suffer rather than let go and start over, especially when you have invested your time and energy in something or someone.
“When someone isn’t treating you right, no matter how much you love them, you’ve got to love yourself more and walk away.” – Unknown
If the people in your life are not making you a better person or helping you grow, it is time to become a little selfish and let them go. And for some reason, if you cannot let them go, then distant yourself and spend less time around them.
Conclusion
“Let go and let God!” Stop getting in your way. You cannot change the external circumstances. The only thing you have control over is the change within yourself.
Happy Living!
Please leave a comment and share how you let go of things you have no control over in your life!
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